Chloe Nicholson
Heartache and pain was her childhood; hurting was the life she lived.
My name is Chloe Anne Ashcroft, I’m only 20 years of a age
And I’ve been through a lot in my life; I have experienced mostly bad memories and only a few good ones.
I was brought up in an unstable home my mum and dad would fight a lot over silly things, I would see my mum hurt and upset and I never knew what to do I would just sit with her and cry.
At the age of 13 my dad become unsafe around the house due to Huntington’s disease and the side affect’s of drugs he took, so he was taken away to a nursing home.
In this time mum and dad spilt and mum started seeing a new guy which I didn’t trust and she knew this so she left me all alone, I was only 14. I was to look after myself as my elder step sister travelled back and forth to Sydney and Brisbane for work. My elder step sister and I thought mum would come back after a week but after two months or so she didn’t return. I felt like no one cared about me, dad was sick and was falling down hill after he had a car accident which left him with a brain hemrigde, the doctor said he might not make it and there’s a big chance he’ll die
that crushed me, mum has ran away with a homeless guy and dads unsafe to live with.
So after two months of living by myself I went to live with my step sister’s dad. I lived there for two years. I was still in school and this is where I was introduced to the worldly ways. You see I was nearly taking away at a young age by a guy but I got away unharmed, I told my parents but they never believed me so from then on I fell into a habit of not trusting anyone with personal problems or any worries I was going thru.
At school I was so shy and scared about everyone finding out about my family and the horrible things I’ve gone thru so I kept to myself until I met this girl who had a big influence on me to open up and have fun.
so I started drinking at the age of 17 only did that to fit in with others in my year as I was too shy to talk about anything, I also use to believe the drinking was helping me to build great friendships but every night I would find myself alone and I would get upset; I use to cry myself to sleep worrying and stressing about what people thought of me but mostly I would stress myself over a disease I might not even have.
You see I have a 50/50 chance of getting a genetic disease my dad has which is Huntington’s disease, for all that don’t know what this is it’s a brain disorder that causes certain brain cells to waste away affecting a way a person thinks, feels and moves. Over time it becomes worse, you lose the ability to do all things as it kills the body. At this time there is no cure.
Recently Wayne and I decided to get tested to see if the results would help me to stop crying and stressing as I did Wayne’s head in as I would cry for about 2 hours or more every night and when he
would ask me “what’s wrong?” I would mumble nothing.
It takes three serious counselling sessions and psychological tests before you can get the results back as Huntington’s has the highest rate for suicide.
At this time Wayne just started to work for Peter Fahd. Who told Wayne about God and Wayne would come home and tell me about it. At first I was like yeah ok well go just to see what church like but I never thought we would go all the time you see the night before Wayne and I decided to go we were saying how we will live each day as it comes and not worry about my results.
At church the next morning Brother Mansoore was preaching and it was like someone had told him our life he was saying how each of our days are numbered and we needed to live for today and not worry about tomorrow as tomorrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Brother Mansour came up to us and gave us a bible each and we went home amazed, it really hit us it was like God himself was calling us. And from then on we got stuck into our bibles but it wasn’t making any sense at first and then we got giving a little book called done that explained a lot and I wanted to get to know our Lord better, so Charlie came over he shared his testimony and I was amazed that God had changed him even Wayne wanted to say the sinners pray in front of Charlie so did I.
I wanted to but I was too shy I hardly said two words to Charlie. So I said the sinners prayer when no one was around I knew I needed god to help me and to change me and from that moment I was happy and I didn’t even realise it I was still blind till people at work said I’m a lot happier and i always have a smile on my face and after I got home from work I realise that the holy
spirit was working inside of me changing my old ways because I used to walk around gloomy & unhappy.
Now with the Lord in my life I read and study the bible daily. I even talk more to people at church at first I was like a leech stuck on Wayne I would just say hi and wanted to run out the door as soon as I had the chance.
I’ve asked God to help me and He has God has done many things for me and I’m truly thankful that he is willing to help His giving me a closer bond with family and my mum and I are really close now that she is saved. God has allowed Wayne and I to get married and to have a beautiful wedding we never thought was possible. God has helped and showed me to have great friendships with many of you girls here today not only are you all great friends you are all my sisters too.
God has giving me the strength to stop crying and stressing every night even though my results came back positive for Huntington’s disease, yeah I’m going to get it and yeah there’s no cure but who needs one when you’ve got God in your life to keep you going and to keep you strong.
God is willing and through Him I’ve learnt to follow his ways and trust him with all my heart. God provides and has taken care of my every need even when I fall, he gets me back up and in his word again I praise God for all he has helped me with. God is good and I praise god for the many blessings he has given me and the greatest blessing of all is that I know without a doubt that if I die tonight I know I have eternal life with Jesus my personal saviour who I love with all my heart and mind and I thank the lord that I get to become a part of his beautiful and loving caring family and a member of this wonderful church. Thank you Jesus x
Source: eternity.org.au (used with permission)